change

late night, and i started to read some old messages. some made me smile. some made me a bit sad. dah jauh perjalanan ni sebenar nya 🙂 i’ve gone through a lot. and sebenar nya macam tak sangka i managed to survive that. some are really heartbreaking ! but one thing that i noticed, people do change. everyone of us changed. a lot ! i too changed due to some circumstances. i may be become a bit cold. keadaan sekarang tak membenarkan aku jadi perempuan biasa or just being myself. sedih dan berat sebenarnya. but i let myself adapt dengan…

Longggg Hol

sipping my cup of ginger ale. cold one. and a chocolate bar. tv is playing Kingsman. life is good ☺️ seronok betul kalo tak keje tapi still got paid. haishh. mana nak dapat kehidupan camtu ? bila Malaysia ada long holiday camni aku paling seronok lah. sebab utama i don’t to go to work. i don’t have to attend any meetings. i don’t have to pick up calls too. duduk rumah mandi kan Sofea anta dia pegi school. balik rumah breakfast. kalo rajin cuci baju dan vacum umah. routine. nampak cam simple tapi sebenar nya penat jugak. ni pn ada lagi…

Sorry Little Girl

baru siap mandi. watching P Ramlee. was not okay. not really happy. not really healthy. i feel bloated. super bloated. mcm nk kempis kan jer semua yang kembang kembang nih. 😭 stress tahu ? kesian Sofea lah kalau aku bad mood. Daddy pn kesian jugak. tak pepasal jer semua benda jd tak kene 😪 tak seronok lah camni sebenar nya. rasa cam nk jauh kan diri dr semua orang pon ada. nak kata tak cukup kasih sayang, aku rasa elok jer. tak de pn rasa terabai ke apa. ntah laa. i don’t understand myself.   sorry Sofea. i’m not that good….

I Need Ideas

memandangkan aku masih belum sebok like hell. so kita guna kan masa sebaiknya. bukan dengan aktiviti kurang berfaedah ( sebab laki kau xde kan ?) cuba kalo ada dekat udah breakfast pon Kelana Jaya memandangkan umah aku dh nak start renovation ( and aku blom bayar deposit utk reno lagi ) kene laa aku buat homework sikit apa nak beli, camane nak susun umah tu nanti. memandangkan living hall aku coet jer. i think ini jer pon dh memadai. haha. dedua laki ngn sofea suka lepak depan tv. so tang tv tu kene beso sikit lah.sofa kene selesa sbb depa dua…

Day One

cleaning up my new space. aku x minat sgt file berlambak kat belakang meja. jiwa rasa semak. so what i did was, i put those files dalam kotak and stack them up ✌🏻 and tak de tempat lain selain di tepi dinding sana. janji tersorok dari pandangan mata aku. jadi meja belakang ni macam tempat aku letak semua barangan peribadi. macam sebuah kenangan aku dan masa dulu. i have my photo with Sal and mummy. i have my Sydney tumbler from Aishatul. i have my Honma from the one and only ❤️ i have my selipar jepun from Zul and…

A New Beginning

we are going back to KL soon. was here in Ipoh to celebrate Hari Raya Korban 😊 haha i don’t do Raya alone i guess this time ❤️ happy & thankful but office is no longer the same. won’t be seeing the only one as much as i do now. sobs 😭 but life must go on. i’ll see you in the evening okay ? if you are not playing golf 🤣   to be honest i feel a lot better despite of going to an alien space. i feel my semangat lifted. my head feels so light. as if…

Be Happy

office life sucks big time 🤦 every year bila shortfall prestasi belanja i always have this ‘whatever konon’ attitude. at least for the past three years. tapi hakikat nya semua tu sangat menghantui perasaan aku 😭 the feeling of kau-tak-pandai-buat-kerja is super yuck ! and memang aku jenis terbawak bawak sampai ke rumah. tu pasal kekadang jd bad mood. jadi diam memikirkan masa depan. semua lah last two years aku siap bawak diri pegi dome sorang diri minum frap choc. and time tu sbb aku emo aku pilih choc yg bentuk frog. everything was so ugly time tu hence the…