Longggg Hol

sipping my cup of ginger ale. cold one. and a chocolate bar. tv is playing Kingsman. life is good ☺️ seronok betul kalo tak keje tapi still got paid. haishh. mana nak dapat kehidupan camtu ?

bila Malaysia ada long holiday camni aku paling seronok lah. sebab utama i don’t to go to work. i don’t have to attend any meetings. i don’t have to pick up calls too. duduk rumah mandi kan Sofea anta dia pegi school. balik rumah breakfast. kalo rajin cuci baju dan vacum umah. routine. nampak cam simple tapi sebenar nya penat jugak. ni pn ada lagi baju tak anta pegi laundry.

got my parcel too. barang dari jepun. hiuhiuhiu. sample for the new pink foundation. haihh best btol. got some shawl from hanimarissa too. shawl malas malas pegi sekolah ke pegi beli goreng pisang ke. haha ntah bila pn hidup aku g beli goreng pisang πŸ˜…

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he left for Mersing Β sbb tangki die runtuh. haha. lama dah tak de kesah benda benda runtuh ni. cerun ke ape benda laa. hihi. nampak tak entri ni sebenar nya tadak purpose. just telling that i am happy dan tenang.

xoxo

Sorry Little Girl

baru siap mandi. watching P Ramlee. was not okay.

not really happy. not really healthy. i feel bloated. super bloated. mcm nk kempis kan jer semua yang kembang kembang nih. 😭 stress tahu ?

kesian Sofea lah kalau aku bad mood. Daddy pn kesian jugak. tak pepasal jer semua benda jd tak kene πŸ˜ͺ tak seronok lah camni sebenar nya. rasa cam nk jauh kan diri dr semua orang pon ada. nak kata tak cukup kasih sayang, aku rasa elok jer. tak de pn rasa terabai ke apa. ntah laa. i don’t understand myself.

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sorry Sofea. i’m not that good. but i try. cuma sometimes mama gagal 😒 i pray that you will always be happy and healthy. i love you ❀️ even sometimes i feel that i don’t deserve you.

xoxo

I Need Ideas

memandangkan aku masih belum sebok like hell. so kita guna kan masa sebaiknya. bukan dengan aktiviti kurang berfaedah ( sebab laki kau xde kan ?) cuba kalo ada dekat udah breakfast pon Kelana Jaya

memandangkan umah aku dh nak start renovation ( and aku blom bayar deposit utk reno lagi )Β kene laa aku buat homework sikit apa nak beli, camane nak susun umah tu nanti. memandangkan living hall aku coet jer. i think ini jer pon dh memadai. haha. dedua laki ngn sofea suka lepak depan tv. so tang tv tu kene beso sikit lah.sofa kene selesa sbb depa dua suka tido sesama

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jap nnt tgk dining area plak lah. hhaha. lapar nih.

xoxo

Day One

cleaning up my new space. aku x minat sgt file berlambak kat belakang meja. jiwa rasa semak. so what i did was, i put those files dalam kotak and stack them up ✌🏻 and tak de tempat lain selain di tepi dinding sana. janji tersorok dari pandangan mata aku.

jadi meja belakang ni macam tempat aku letak semua barangan peribadi. macam sebuah kenangan aku dan masa dulu. i have my photo with Sal and mummy. i have my Sydney tumbler from Aishatul. i have my Honma from the one and only ❀️ i have my selipar jepun from Zul and cermin from Che Cah. nnt aku yakin akan ada files dan surat dan kerja kerja pending. but not today laa.

i have so much love for this people. mungkin dorang jer tak tahu sangat. haha. but they stay in my heart. not in the mood of working yet. i have something to do but this PC is not helping.

so may be later la. i’m so sleepy too πŸ˜ͺ

okay done meroboh kan meja ni. dah alih kan PC and printer. apemende laa semua longgok atas meja. habukkkk. stress! now this room dah bersih, berkilat dan bercahaya. hahah.

xoxo

A New Beginning

we are going back to KL soon. was here in Ipoh to celebrate Hari Raya Korban 😊 haha i don’t do Raya alone i guess this time ❀️

happy & thankful

but office is no longer the same. won’t be seeing the only one as much as i do now. sobs 😭 but life must go on. i’ll see you in the evening okay ? if you are not playing golf 🀣

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to be honest i feel a lot better despite of going to an alien space. i feel my semangat lifted. my head feels so light. as if my burden is gone. i hope i can survive this changes ✌🏻

it won’t be that easy sebenarnya. six years of suka duka n penat lelah. semua kenangan yg ada, berat jugak laa rasa hati tu. tapi paling berat sebenar nya is because of him. koh koh koh clingy girlfriend alert !

anyway i hope we can still have a great life ahead. lets grow old together. until our hair turns grey. i love you 🦁

xoxo

Be Happy

office life sucks big time 🀦

every year bila shortfall prestasi belanja i always have this ‘whatever konon’ attitude. at least for the past three years. tapi hakikat nya semua tu sangat menghantui perasaan aku 😭

the feeling of kau-tak-pandai-buat-kerja is super yuck ! and memang aku jenis terbawak bawak sampai ke rumah. tu pasal kekadang jd bad mood. jadi diam memikirkan masa depan. semua lah

last two years aku siap bawak diri pegi dome sorang diri minum frap choc. and time tu sbb aku emo aku pilih choc yg bentuk frog. everything was so ugly time tu hence the frog thingy. kecewa πŸ˜₯

boleh tak saya dh tanak serabut serabut buat keje ? tanak dah terbawak bawak sampai ke rumah. balik umah nak tenang jer. balik ke pangkuan keluarga makes me feel better.

parah lagi when he wasnt around. yes he left for something official. mula laa aku rasa lost sikit. kalo ada tu walau pon kekadang pening tapi at least rasa secure. rasa gak tenang nya tu. tapi dah balik pon so tayah drama sgt lah aku pon. kata tak clingy πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

xoxo

Helo

baru balik dating 😻 okay muka kucing gatal. but whatever.

homed and watching World Cup now. iced water and McD’s durian party pack. France is leading too. heaven !

a tough week i must say. tough sebab banyak sangat benda nak kene buat. bukan one after another, tapi semua nya nak kene buat sekaligus. tangan ada sepasang jer pon. how ? nasib phone ada dua jer. kalo tiga baru jadi ismet ulam raja. kiri kanan berbunyi. kadang satu tanya pasal batu satu tanya pasal menu. jap karang tanya barang bila nk order. semua benda pun berbeza.

kadang kadang terfikir aku ni buat business bebanyak nak ape ntah. nak kata nak kaya tu tak de laa sangat. tapi more to rasa selagi ada daya kerja laa sekuat nya. peluang tak selalu datang. selagi ada kudrat dan tenaga, berusaha lah. mana laa tau dapat membantu pada masa depan. kalau kaya pun ada bagus nya, cuma harap tak hilang perasaan rendah diri jer lah.

 

i am so thankful that i have a good support system. hence, i don’t easily cracked under pressure. i always find strength in everyone i have around me. their attention, their help and their love, are all like the air that i breathe.