I Gave Up


i have decided to give up on you. may be it is not meant for me this year. i am no enemy of your time, but my timeline doesn’t suit yours for now 💔

no matter how much i want something, no matter how much hope i have, it just won’t happen sometimes 😔

some other time, may be.


Hey Budak

menduga jiwa 😪

dari pagi asek sepah kan barang. suruh kemas main sumbat jer barang die kt meja ngn drawer. some die buh jer dalam umah kecik die tu. pls, jangan malas ❗️


wahai buah hati,

janganlah macam macam sangat perangai nya. ada masa mama penat yee. non stop mama. kadang rasa musykil pun ada 😩 time mandi tu laa macam macam nak di kabo nya. time tu laa nak di tanya segala benda.

i know i will miss all theseeee later on. but for now mama rasa stress sikit 😭 thank you la daddy bawak Sofea jenjalan for 4 hours. i can cook dengan tenang 😘 nak tdo pn kene paksa. kene jual nama daddy dulu baru laju nak tdo. kalo mak nya ni haa, tak de die heran nya 🤨


Deep Blue Sea 2

so i cooked today. just to eat by myself.

and now terasa amat mental bila tengok movie pasal shark. i hate them. some people said they are beautiful creatures. how come ? may be dorang tak pernah tengok merak, burung nuri, or rama-rama 🦋

do you know that i possses thalassophia ? fear of the sea. open seas are so mysterious and frightening 😫 i know that laut is so soothing. cantik dan menenangkan. but ketahui lah dalan tenang sesuatu tu pasti ada taufan nya 🤐

okay now sakit kepala sbb tengok cite ni. plus im too full. and bloated.



still doing good. but with a little pause. need to adjust a few things.

perlu kan semangat baru jugak rasa nya nih 😪 dari semalam berfikir, what do i want to achieve this year ? Rasa nya my plan will be as follows

➡️ study IR and a bit of history

Dari awal dulu mmg plan nak sambung belajar but i don’t fancy MBA. Benda sy tak minat. There is so much fun in politics. Especially when you can study politics and religion simultaneously ☺️

Eg : when GE was held on Wednesday, tak de orang pon ingat that Rasulullah once mentioned that hari rabu ialah hari kemusnahan yg berterusan. Firaun and Qarun contoh nya

➡️ get my house renovated and pindah for good

a house is always a home for me. so i need it to be warm and welcoming. it is where we belong. apa pn masalah, apa pun kesedihan we always find way to be home. A little excited about this 😜

➡️ family planning

I think i will need to settle down and start a family again. Haha i don’t want to die alone 😂



going back to hometown in a bit. dah lama tak balik kampung. as usual bila nk balik jer i have this weird feeling since my dad was not around. i know dah dua tahun, but i just cannot deal with it just yet.

in need of vacation too. will need to be away for awhile i guess.

life was not that cool either. been thinking about my study. whether to go abroad or not. been so comot for the past few years. asal pegi ofis jer serabai. rasa nya i have been recycling the same baju sama throughout the year 😷 tak pernah nak elok pakai baju kurung. haih


rasa nya i need semangat baru. high time to rejuvenate !






jiwa raga ❤️

dua dua menyakitkan hati. kadang sampai speechless. tak tergambar geram nya perasaan. tp ini jugak lah hiburan yang ada. yang mampu gembira kan hati. yang mampu buat aku ketawa.

sometimes terfikir, what would i do if i don’t have you two ?


Random Rant

so i am back to my routine. watching The Big Bag Theory 🤪 at least that makes me happy. oh i have received my Sephora items too. actually that is my first time buying Sephora online. just stocking up my stuff. they are all Too Faced and a Farsali Unicorn Essence.  it’s gold card sale ladies. how can i say no to that 20% ? lies i tell myself

i am so not happy with my body now. i almost hate everything about it. my skin is not that good. i have bulge all over my body 😭 it makes me feel super bad. i am not confident at all. putting on my tops and bottoms is never easy now. i really need to do something about it. but hitting the gym is not my main move now. too lazy to pack and have schedule. i think i’ll go for a little diet and workout on my own for now 💪🏻 i just want to get stronger.


*trying to stay away from anything political, at least for now*